Come Heel or High Water Retention

Have you noticed that wearing high-heeled shoes makes you look thinner? It instantly transforms a frumpy outfit into a sexy one. 

So now that I've gained some weight, I'm back to wearing heels. Problem is, that's extra weight to carry on your tippy-toes. 

Isn't it a bummer that the fat (does it sound better to call it water retention?) that makes you need heels also makes it harder to wear them?

Perfect, juuust perfect. 

Sigh.

Photo from garancedore.

Click here for previous posts on fatness.

daily dishonesty

Remember here when I told you I have a hard time lying and that this one lie (above) I had to admit I actually do tell?

Well, I discovered this blog that very prettily (via her hand-drawn typography) features the lies we tell every day. And it made me realize there are a few lies I do tell myself...

I just cannot give up junk food & candy.

Oh, they won't. Because I am really never getting on that treadmill. Remember these yoga mats?

But yes, these actually do.

Oh, and the quintessential lie of a crammer...  

Nah, I'll do it at the very last minute. :)

But this, I never lie about. I know I will have more than one glass. Okay, possibly a whole bottle.

Neither do I tell this lie.

I guess I'm an unapologetic drinker. Haha!

It is true that I find it really difficult to lie. These next two are pretty common lies that I really cannot bring myself to tell.

I'm always honest about this. I say "I just READ your text".

I struggle especially with this next one. 

I'd rather text where, on the road, I am so the person I'm meeting can estimate what time I will arrive rather than commit to 5 minutes when I'm not sure I can make it on time.

But there still are lies I have no trouble telling myself. This one I actually believe. 

I actually believe that I lose weight from shopping all day! Yes, I've lied so well to myself about it that I don't realize it's a lie anymore. Turns out, I am guilty of some daily dishonesty. 

Photos from dailydishonesty.

resolution premonition

You know my new year's resolution to lose weight is a lost cause when...

... I see placemats instead of yoga mats in the photo above.

Eeep.

Photo from my Facebook newsfeed. If you know where this photo is from, please email me so I can give due credit.

Click here for previous posts about fatness.

dear person taking my photo

While picking the pumpkin shots for this post here, this letter started writing itself in my head. Because how many times have you crouched down or tilted your head or bent your body in an attempt to fit into a photo... Only to discover later how much head space there was above you so you could have actually just stood up straight?

So it's not just you, dear T who took this particular photo. I am also addressing this letter to a lot of other friends (& random waiters in restos)...

Dear person taking my photo, I really wish you would tell me if you were going to zoom out enough for me to fit my whole un-contorted body in the photo so I can get out of my contorted pose. Please do not immortalize me in a photo with my upper body in an unflattering right angle. Also because crouching down - worse, squatting unnecessarily - is not really a breeze either (yes, I'm that unfit) especially when I'm also trying to suck in my tummy (hehe).

Plus, it makes you seem like a professional photographer! The one photography lesson I retained from the hubby (yes, all that aperture talk was lost on me) is to resist putting people's faces in the vertical middle of the frame and instead, minimize the space above people's heads - especially if that's mostly just a blank wall or unsightly ceiling.

So dear non-professional photographer taking my picture... Kapag kasya naman ako sa picture (if I fit into the picture anyway), please please tell me not to bend or crouch down anymore.

Photo is my own.

Click here for previous posts from the Dear... series.

their Spring, our Summer colors

I admit, it was a relief to see Gwyneth Paltrow on the cover of the Harper's Bazaar Spring 2012 issue in black. Yes, the above is the subscription cover (that, as you know from here, is different from the newsstand cover). And yes, it is the Spring issue.

Very different from the usual colorful Spring issues - like the March 2012 Aussie version here, right?

It was a busy start-of-the-summer at work for me. So trying to avoid black this summer would have been added pressure. Plus, I can always count on black to hide the fat. :) I was going to wear anything I wanted anyway, so it was good to get Gwyneth's nod of approval.

The funny thing is that after I get a license to wear black during the summer, I can't help get drawn to Spring's pastels. You already know how I am obsessed with seafoam green here.

So imagine how kid-in-a-candy-store I felt at H&M during my recent trip to Singapore. I was hoping to score some Marni-H&M returns (see related post here), but that didn't work out. Fortunately, the pastels of the Conscious Collection consoled me (and the environment at the same time).

I ended up buying the printed straight dress below, those peach shorts that I plan to pair with a sheer seafoam green sleeveless top I also got at H&M.

Oh, and how do I hide the fat in these light pastels? Well, like I always say when I gain a few pounds, it's either time to hop on the treadmill or go shopping for bigger clothes. I just did the latter! Problem solved in Spring's pastels! 

Photos from pinkwallpaper, H&M, here, here and here.

Click here for previous posts on fatness.

by the nth outfit...

I tried on countless outfits this morning because every one of them was too tight. Sigh... I am at my fattest. I am exactly the same weight as I was when I gave birth to Noah. Granted, I only gained 18 pounds during that pregnancy and the pounds all seemed to go to my belly. But I cannot fathom how I can weigh the same as when I had an 8-pound-baby and all that amniotic-fluid-and-placenta stuff in me!

And by the nth outfit, I was not only so depressed at my fatness that I wanted to binge on breakfast, but I was also so late for work, I didn't have time to go to the gym anymore. Painfully ironic, right?

Photo from annnniegirl. 

i wish...

... I could get through the holiday party photos looking like this. Long and slender despite the grand feasts that come with these holiday parties.

I wish I could get the camera owners to stretch the photo lengthwise - just a tad - before posting the photos on facebook.

Or maybe I can get them to drink...

So they end up taking blurred photos?

Hahaha! Enjoy the season's countless holiday parties!

Photos from anniegirl.

Click here for previous posts on fatness.

oomph piece

I am a believer that towering heels can make any outfit look great. An outfit that looks dowdy and frumpy in flats is magically transformed into a smart, chic look with towering heels. They just give that oomph every fashionista [who has gained ten pounds] needs. Somehow, I stand up straighter, look slimmer, project a more stylish demeanor just by slipping on these oomph pieces on my feet!

Turns out, slipping on an oomph piece on your head works just as well... Check out these hats from the Hermes FW 2011 collection. Don't they make these puzzling, almost questionable outfits striking?

Isn't it magical how adding an oomph piece transforms a look?

Photo of the towering Pradas is a re-post from here. Photos of the Hermes FW 2011 looks from Vogue.

Click here for a related post on these Hermes hats.

that kind of day

As awful as it may be, I have to admit I draw a bit of comfort that even models have that kind of day.

That kind of day always makes me late for work. I end up trying on many different outfits before I find one that doesn't make it look so much like that kind of day.

But when that kind of day goes on for weeks, it's either time to hop on the treadmill or go shopping for bigger clothes! I prefer the latter. After all, as Carrie Bradshaw once said, "Shopping is [my] cardio." :D 

Photos from harpersbazaar and here.

Click here and here for previous posts on that kind of day.

the calorie elves

Seriously... am starting to believe these creatures exist!

If only... they would make like those elves from that children's book and instead make me new shoes! :) I certainly won't mind waking up to red-soled ones.

Photo from thatswhatthatmeans.

Click here for a previous post on getting fat. Click here for a previous post on those red-soled shoes.

Time to bring out the flats.

I've gotten fat. I don't even need to weigh myself to know this. I feel the weight on the 4-inch-heels I wear to work. So it's time to bring out my flats! And maybe cool it with the Kool-aid a bit.

Photo from sparklesandpretending.