Sunday, July 3, 2011

dear immigration officer

Three years ago, I was traveling every 2-3 weeks for work so I booked a lot of time at the immigration lines at our airport. I noticed that what was taking so long was the typing. Every immigration officer typed with only their index fingers! Imagine what a typing class for immigration officers would do for travelers!

So (assuming typing has not been rendered obsolete by the machine-readable passports these days)...

Dear Immigration Officer,

Please enroll yourself in a typing class. It's really easy! Just a few days of your typing teacher chanting "A - S - D - F.  A - S - D - F.  A - S - D - F." and you will be typing passport data without even having to look at the keys! You will even learn to type Joyce Kilmer's poem Trees into the shape of a Christmas tree as part of your centering lesson!
that I shall
never see a poem
as lovely as a tree. A tree

Now wouldn't that be a useful skill for when you pretend the alignment button on your paragraph toolbar doesn't work?

Oh, the things you learn in school in the 90's! I wonder if they still teach this today? If they do, ooohh! I can see another letter brewing... Dear Typing Teacher...

Photo from Kate Spade

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